Bianca's Father Knows Best - Song Parody

It was a nice day in Nuvema Town. A young girl named Bianca was excited as ever. She and her friends Cheren, Hilbert, and Hilda would all begin their Pokemon journey, and her mother was excited. Her father, however...

Bianca: Daddy, me and my friends will all go on a Pokemon journey!

BD: A journey?

Bianca: Yes! Can I go?

BD: Oh, Bianca...

You want to go outside?
Oh, why, Bianca?

Look at you, as fragile as a mouse.
Still a little sapling, just a sprout.
You know why we stay up in this house.
(Bianca: Yeah, but-)
That's right, to keep you safe and sound, dear.

Guess I always knew this day was coming.
Knew that soon you'd want to leave the nest.
Soon, but not yet.
(Bianca: Uh-)
Just trust me, pet
Father knows best

Father knows best
Listen to your father
It's a scary world out there

Father knows best
One way or another
Something will go wrong, I swear

Ruffians, thugs,
Poison-types, Sandstorms,
Cannibals and Ekans, the plague
(Bianca: No!)
Yes!
(Bianca: But-)

Also Bug-types,
Bites with pointy teeth and-
Stop, no more, you'll just upset me!

Father's right here.
Father will protect you.
Darling, here's what I suggest!

Save the trauma,
Stay with papa.
Father knows best!

Father knows best.
Much more than your mumsy.
On your own, you won't survive!

Sloppy, under-dressed,
Immature, clumsy,
Please, they'll eat you up alive!

Gullible, naive,
Positively grubby,
Ditzy and a bit, well, hmm, vague.

Plus, I believe
Gettin' kinda chubby?
I'm just saying 'cause I love you!

Father understands,
Father's here to help you,
All I have is one request!

Bianca?
(Bianca: Yes?)
Never ask to go on a Pokemon journey again!
(Bianca: Yes, daddy.)

(Hilda: Bianca, you coming?)
(Bianca: I'm still talking about it.)
(Hilbert: Let's give her time.)

Don't forget it,
You'll regret it.
Father knows best!

--Cut to Nimbasa City, outside the gym--

Bianca: Going on a journey was so much fun! I have three badges now!

BD: Oh, so you did leave?

Bianca: Daddy? Why are you here?

BD: To take you home, of course.

Bianca: But why? I think I love this!

BD: Love this? Please, Bianca, that's demented.
This is why you never should have left!
Dear, this whole fantasy that you've invented
Just proves you're too naive to be here.

Why would you like this? Come on now, really?
Look at you! You think anyone's impressed?
Don't be bratty,
Come to daddy.
Father...

Bianca: No!

BD: No? Oh, I see how it is...

Bianca knows best.
Bianca's so mature now.
Such a clever grownup miss.

Bianca knows best.
Fine, if you're so sure now,
Go ahead, then look at this! *pulls out Bianca's permanent record, showing three wins to five losses*
Ha!

That's why your friends are here.
Don't let them deceive you.
Just tell them and watch, you'll see.

Trust me, my dear,
That's how fast they'll leave you!
I won't say I told you so!

No, Bianca knows best!
So if you're such a champion,
Go and put me to the test! *pulls out a Poke Ball*

If you're dying,
Don't come crying!
Father knows best! *sends out Darmanitan*

Bianca: Okay, I'll show you! *sends out Pignite* Let's finish this once and for all!